Yep, So we are all going to die

When I first saw the viral clip of my Senator telling one of her constituents "We are all going to die." and the follow-up cemetery video, my first reaction was pure rage. I thought, "well, I guess that is why she won't meet with me, she doesn't have the courage to say that to my face." In March, I told one of her aids how I was diagnosed with kidney cancer, all about my treatment and side effects. They pretended to be concerned. They also gave the appearance of concern when I pointed out that kidney cancer is significantly more common in soldiers due to the chemicals they have encountered at various bases and deployments. Maybe the staff people do care, but she sure as hell doesn't.

After I calmed down a bit, I moved into the sadness phase. It just makes me so sad that any other human being would be that cold, let alone a Senator or an Iowan. Don't get me wrong, I have met some real asshole Iowans, but that seemed just too brutally cold for a people who pride ourselves on our neighborliness and the strength of our communities. I also have an old fashioned idealism when it comes to Senators. When I was in six grade, I put on one of my mom's blazers and dressed up as a Senator for Career Day. Being a Senator always felt important and like somebody who could really do important things. I suppose I probably need to let that go. She also claims to be a Christian. I tried to picture Jesus standing in front of a crowd saying that and then making that most tone deaf of videos. My recollections from Sunday school is that Jesus healed the sick and turned over the money changer tables in the temple.

But after further reflection, I actually am starting to feel worried for her. I know greed can do some terrible things to people's morality and basic human decency, But how much money or power does it take to become so brazen and unfeeling? She's sold her soul. That can't feel good. I mean I'm sure the parties and the crumbs of applause from her bosses feel great, but at 3 in the morning, it's got to be a real dark night of the soulless.

When I was angry, I wished Joani would get kidney cancer. But with my luck, I wouldn't be particular enough with the genie and remember to specify metastatic. Plus, she would get top notch health care because she is a Senator. All Congresspeople should be on Medicaid. They shouldn't even be allowed to buy private insurance or COBRA. Of course they would lose their coverage when they fail to meet the work requirements when they don't read the bills.

OK, obviously I'm still angry. There is just something about that phrase "We are all going to die" that's such a punch in the face when you are terminally ill. Joanie hasn't got the faintest clue what it feels like to live with a terminal disease. That's fine most people don't and that is a very good thing. I want people not to know. But generally, most people, are, while sometimes a bit clumsy about it, curious, empathetic, and kind. They care at least a little and at the very least don't want to be a complete shithead so will avoid saying "We are all going to die" in the presence of a terminally ill person. It is the most basic of manners. Looks like Joanie has lost her basic manners. Probably she sold them. I was going to say I hope she got a good price for them. Really I rather hope she does the work to find them and better yet, do what's right for Iowans instead of wealthy donors. In my mind, of course, this means saying no to the Medicaid cuts and cuts to cancer research funding. Sure, I'm just one Iowan, but since we have the 2nd highest cancer rate in the country, it matters to a hell of a lot of us.